When my baby left for the Army, my momma heart was broken. Tears of sadness and fear flowed for what seemed like a week, and then would just come out of nowhere from time to time. I waited by the phone for the limited calls she was able to make home, then we would both cry when we spoke. My marriage had been on the rocks for awhile, but I held on by my nails for what I could revive of it. I felt empty. I had been responsible for another person since I was a child, first with my siblings, and then for my own children. Everyone had grown up and had families of their own. What was my role now? I poured all I had into work. I started staying with my patients more, talking for hours with the nurses, many of which were in the same phase of life as me, with their children leaving home, left to figure out what comes next.

When basic training graduated approached, we loaded up the family and drove to Georgia for the ceremony. Kayla looked so different with the short blond hair, crisp uniform, and military demeanor. I was just so happy to see her, we hugged and cried, and I just wanted to put her in the car and take her home with me. I hung on to every minute we had together, and then we headed home, while she loaded up to go to AIT for her specialty training. High school graduation preparations were in the works, and the idea came to see if she could come home to walk with her class for graduation. Calls were made to her instructors and commander, and the approval was given for a short trip home to attend her graduation. Her dad drove down to get her, and I was so happy to have her home. She wore her uniform to graduation, we put together a quick party for our family to celebrate her, and she was off again to the military, and my life was forever changed.

Changes were happening at the hospital as well. The obstetric department was growing, and plans were made to expand the labor and delivery area and move the mother/baby area to another floor. Tubs were incorporated into the plans for 2 of the 7 spacious labor rooms, with an expanded nursing station and triage area. Midwifery had been incorporated into the plans! Little by little my years of educating staff about decreasing interventions, and patients about expecting and requesting support for their birth plans was paying off! A place was being made for our mommas to birth their way.

On New Year’s day we received a video call from Kayla in Korea. I had learned to utilize this new technology in order to see my girl’s face as I chatted with her about her new life there. But this call was different. In the background was a guy, introduced to us as her fiance, Chris. News came that they wanted to get married, in Indiana, and she wanted me to plan the wedding! In March, 3 months away! My mind was spinning! Are you sure? Why so quickly? It seemed surreel. But this seems to be the military way, I had seen it many times when I was active duty. Married couples could apply to have joint domicile, which would allow them to apply to be assigned to the same duty station for their next assignment. The process took time, and they were only to be in Korea for 1 year, so time was ticking away. I pulled out my notebook from Jaime’s wedding that I helped plan 3 years before, elicited Jaime’s help, and got to work planning a wedding. I reserved the church, flowers, caterer, and ordered dresses. I was so pleased with my progress, and couldn’t wait until our next call to update Kayla on our progress. When the call came, news that the dates wouldn’t work due to field exercises they would have in March, so the date was changed, and they had submitted for leave for the last week in February. February! 2 months away! I went to work calling all scheduled services, and was able to change every one of them. February is not a popular month for weddings.

The wedding was beautiful, but not without memorable events. My grandson, Tyler, was the ring bearer. The night of the rehearsal dinner Tyler was sick, and he rested on the church pew during rehearsal and laid on the floor and slept during the dinner. The morning of the wedding I was awakend by my sister to tell me that she had been up sick all night, and couldn’t pick up the flowers. Off to pick up the flowers I went, then to the church and reception hall to decorate. By wedding time some of the other relatives were feeling ill, but the wedding went on. By the end of the reception, I started feeling ill, and I sat on the steps as others cleaned up as the guests were leaving. Kayla called to say that they had to stop on the way to their honeymoon getaway for Chris to throw up. By the time I got home I was vomiting as well. By morning most of the immediate family was ill with the stomach bug, including Chris’ grandparents from Georgia. Plans to travel home were delayed while everyone recuperated. A memorable wedding to be sure, not exactly the way we would have liked. But they were married, and their next duty assignment together was Okinawa, Japan.

The move into the new unit at Clark was amazing. It felt like we could breathe in the spacious area designed for us. Two of the rooms were designed with the midwife patient in mind, with large tubs to labor in, and telemetry monitors so the patients weren’t tethered to the machine while being monitored for fetal heart tones in labor. The nurses had room to move around in the nursing station, with several computers so everyone could use one. Having mother/baby on another floor was an adjustment, as were the new roles developed for staff.

Dr. Miller had been experiencing anxiety and stress over a lawsuit that had been brought against him over a patient that he assumed care for from another physician, with the patient suffering complications and later succumming from the complications. His mantra to me since beginning my employment with him had been, “If you are going to worry about lawsuits all the time, you don’t need to be practicing obstetrics.” But this was different for him. He didn’t cause this problem, he tried to fix it for someone else. He became very anxious about liabilities in his practice. One day he called me and Susan into his office. “I’ve decided to do away with the midwifery service. You have 3 months to let your patients know and find other jobs.” We were devastated. I had heard of this type of thing happening to other midwives, but to us? We had a successful practice, dedicated patients, good rapport with the nurses and physicians in our hospital. But so had many of them. We were expendible. The physicians can do what we do, gyn and obstetrics. But they don’t do it the way that we do, “With Women.” Our patients started a letter writing campaign. The nurses spoke up for us. But he wasn’t backing down, he was cutting his liabilities, and we were liabilities. I applied for the position of nurse-manager at the hospital, interviewed for the position, but before taking it appealed to Dr. Miller one more time. I offered to practice as a nurse practitioner, providing prenatal and gynecology care in the office, and maybe catch babies during the day when he was in the office. After careful consideration, he agreed. But only for me. Susan was still left to find a job.